The Cult of the Avicado Christ

Sacred Rituals

The Guacening: Every Sunday at 4:20PM, followers gather to mash avocados in silence while listening to ambient whale noises remixed with pan flute.

The Rind Cleanse: A meditative exfoliation using dried avocado skins. Said to reveal one’s true seasoning.

Avicado Baptism: Dip your hand in sacred lime juice, then high-five a stranger.